I'm  glad that so many of you enjoy this blog and take the time to let me know. I do appreciate hearing from you. 

Guests had an exhilarating morning today as we awoke to no hot water. It seems both boilers had different, but simultaneous excuses as to why they couldn’t function, and decided to quit at their leisure.  My take on the whole situation is the team of gerbils just got too hot and tired of running on the belt that ran the motor. Of course the only person who could fix the boilers had to come from New Zealand and wouldn’t arrive ‘til late afternoon.  

Viacom and Direct TV’s little spat over fees has put a dent in what limited programming choices we have at the hotel. Why don’t they cut costs by eliminating all but one of the nine sports channels, not showing reality shows that reflect the TV programmer’s lives, cutting out any show that encourages eating otherwise indigestible foods generally not created for human consumption, and finally, get rid of all politically motivated programming.

And, while we’re on the subject of money, the best solution to the global financial crisis is not to forgo the Euro or further tighten austerity measures, nor is it a good idea for more stimulus packages. Why don’t they just recognize the problem for what it is: unbridled greed? All they have to do is roll back the prices on everything to what they were fifty years ago. After that everyone forgives each other’s debts both globally and nationally. Isn’t that what the Lord’s Prayer says to do? You don’t have to be Christian for that to make sense.

Today is the 43rd anniversary of the Apollo 11 launch. To mark that historic occasion, my large pet water turtle, named Hannigan, was allowed to watch it on TV while I held him up to see it. He seemed at a loss for words-- kept spellbound during the entire lift-off. Although I’m sure he was the only turtle in the world observing the event, he never made it into the Guinness Book of Records. He died heartbroken.

Speaking of heartbroken, no one was when Confidante (who you will remember was promoted to Director of Housekeeping) decided to get rid of the ugly beige  prison garb worn by the housekeeping staff at the hotel. No one will own up to why the original butt ugly uniforms were chosen. They have now been replaced by attractive black polo shirts with the hotel’s emblem on them, and everyone looks like a respectable human being.

The 411 guest has been a little delinquent posting her blog. Where has she been? I know y’all  are wondering if I’d lost interest in my own blog because it’s been two, TWO, whole months since I last posted. Meanwhile, I’ve been getting comments saying how much readers have enjoyed my posts; please don’t stop. Not even I can believe it’s been two months. So, here’s the skinny on my absence. It's been a very productive absence, and I almost don’t know where to start.

For those of you who remember me mentioning that I had written a thriller, well it’s been published. I should be doing some shameless self-promotion here, but I’ll get around to that shortly. Writing the book was a joy. It was what came after its publication that almost sent me hurtling over the edge. I’ve had to learn how to do a lot of technical things I’ve never had an interest in doing before because I couldn’t afford to pay someone else to do them for me. You know what they say, Necessity is a real “mother.” Much of my day now keeps me occupied with the business end of publishing.

My first trial came with the conversion of my book into e book formats. I spent weeks formatting and un-formatting the texts due to the lack of specific directions. Sometimes you can almost know too much and it hampers you. Formatting manuscripts for print publishing is very different from digital.  DO NOT let anyone tell you e book conversion is an easy process. They just want to
show off and convince you to hire them when you can’t do it yourself. Barnes and  Noble’s PubIt, and Amazon’s kindle require different html formats. Oh sure they post guidelines on their websites, but there is so much they don’t tell you that would make the process less stressful. You are forced to go online to Google for help from others who’ve already done it. Unfortunately, you get a lot of
misleading and contradictory information. I’m going to give a big tip to anyone out there thinking of doing an e book conversion: take your text file from your book’s manuscript that you used for the print version and remove ALL formatting by putting it in your notepad. Then convert it back to Word. This way you start off with a clean slate to format it the way it needs to be for whatever e book you’re converting to.  Once I figured that out, I was good to go. But by then, I had significantly pulled out most of my hair.

Authors are now expected to do their own marketing for their books. This is a full-time job.
I should have been marketing the book as I was still writing it-- so much for twenty-twenty hindsight. I was writing full-time and writing the blog. Multi-tasking only goes so far. I needed multi-bodies. Did I mention I started my own company through all this? 

And, there’s the little matter of how things have changed here at the hotel. The staff seems to turn over every two months. I’ve already told you Confidante has moved on to management. The face and personality of the front desk (his) is gone. No one hangs out there anymore. There is only one person left at the front desk that has been here since I first arrived. I am rarely downstairs anymore, which is where I pick up most of my material. That’s only half true. I still have the loud speaker wall  which provides me with enough of other people's dirty laundry to air. Just last week, I had the misfortune of sharing the ‘air space’ with a crazy, drunken, blonde bimbo who proceeded to shout obscenities into her cell phone during the wee hours of the morning and also at the man and woman she picked up for a ménage a trois. The hotel didn’t tolerate her, either.  

What I mean to say is I’ve been a little overwhelmed; too many things to do and not enough time. I even stopped exercising in the morning (huge mistake) in order to pick up two more productive hours to my day. Can you believe how fast your body turns to mush when you stop working out? I went into the gym to weigh myself last week (another huge mistake), and in a loud chorus, the machines all sang, “Baby come back.” I only had the time to make it there two days. Do you remember when I used to work out two hours, six days a week? Seems like another lifetime.

Was all the sweat and long hours worth it? Absolutely! THE HOUR TO REAP: A Harper Simone Mystery Novel is out in both paperback and e book. What’s it about? Embezzling a hotel, of course! What started as an inside job grew into so much more. And, while you’re asking-- Who’s behind the murders of three young women? A real-life Mexican cartel in Richmond, Virginia … you
have no idea. And, for those of you looking for a titillating love story, there’s some of that too. You’ll be looking forward to the sequel. You can take a look inside the book at Amazon until I figure out a way to post a sample chapter on my Author Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/PJWoods,novelist.   Yes, you noticed correctly. I publish under P.J. Woods. I bet not even you remember my last name, let alone can pronounce it. (hint: Concodora) If you’ve enjoyed following me on this blog I hope you will buy my book. Better yet, buy a few and give them as gifts. Living in this hotel to research and write the book has cost me a small fortune. You know, I could use all the financial support I can get!

So, this is where I’ve been for the last two months. I could use a little help with marketing the book so I have the time to write the sequel and keep up with this blog. I’d appreciate your help in spreading the word to your friends, family, and co-workers. If you enjoyed reading the book please post a review or comment at the site where you purchased it. Share it on Facebook. Tweet it. 

And, to all my followers: Thanks for your loyalty and patience!