It was raining when I got up so I resigned myself to work out in the hotel gym. I made it through yoga and bench pressing weights, but by the time I finished doing Tai Chi I still craved cardio. I needed to be outside. I looked at the treadmill. Its red shut down key
stuck out what looked like a plastic tongue in my direction. I hate you too. You’re boring. You never take me anywhere.
I donned my fleece jacket, set up Rihanna’s LOUD on my MP3 player and hit the street. I was in such a good mood I dance walked. In case you were the one watching me from the third floor window—get a life. The rain felt great on my face and I’m betting my complexion looks better than yours does. Nana nana nana.
My friend Ketta is concerned she will be electrocuted today at her hair salon. It’s been awhile since we had lightning. I assured her the salon must have grounded electrical plugs. She’s getting a perm anyway. What’s the problem?
We’re expecting the same sports team from last weekend at the hotel. I know one of the players must be the little shit that stole the cue stick I searched for all over the hotel. This afternoon I was ready for him. I hid the cue sticks. Furthermore, I made a sign-up sheet,
so that in the future we will know who and what room to bill for the next heist. Don’t mess with me.
I researched the label “cougar” today, which seems rather predatory if you ask me. I wonder if a man thought of that moniker. What should women call older men who date younger women then? Delusional.
I’m told they’re expecting a“surprise” inspection at the hotel sometime this month. Makes me wonder what they’re trying to find. I haven’t given up hope for the missing cue stick.
The fire alarm went off this afternoon. They frequently test the system but occasionally it’s a bad sensor. In either case, the alarm lets out a very piercing shriek, not unlike the one my mother let out when I was two and she discovered I was really eating a mud pie. I heard the door open across the hall from me so I decided to tell my neighbor it might just be another false alarm and I was going downstairs to check it out because the noise was now driving me crazy. OMG. It was the Adonis I saw checking in yesterday. If he fell under the category of eye candy, then this was Mr. Godiva himself. Tall, dark and handsome had the body of a runningback, which is what you would have seen me doing if the fire was real and I had left his trusting ass upstairs.
Early in the evening I was standing in the lobby when Mr. Godiva walked behind me and patted me on the shoulder saying, “Hi, neighbor!” He touched me, and now my world will never be the same, because he touched me.
Sorry Barbra.
stuck out what looked like a plastic tongue in my direction. I hate you too. You’re boring. You never take me anywhere.
I donned my fleece jacket, set up Rihanna’s LOUD on my MP3 player and hit the street. I was in such a good mood I dance walked. In case you were the one watching me from the third floor window—get a life. The rain felt great on my face and I’m betting my complexion looks better than yours does. Nana nana nana.
My friend Ketta is concerned she will be electrocuted today at her hair salon. It’s been awhile since we had lightning. I assured her the salon must have grounded electrical plugs. She’s getting a perm anyway. What’s the problem?
We’re expecting the same sports team from last weekend at the hotel. I know one of the players must be the little shit that stole the cue stick I searched for all over the hotel. This afternoon I was ready for him. I hid the cue sticks. Furthermore, I made a sign-up sheet,
so that in the future we will know who and what room to bill for the next heist. Don’t mess with me.
I researched the label “cougar” today, which seems rather predatory if you ask me. I wonder if a man thought of that moniker. What should women call older men who date younger women then? Delusional.
I’m told they’re expecting a“surprise” inspection at the hotel sometime this month. Makes me wonder what they’re trying to find. I haven’t given up hope for the missing cue stick.
The fire alarm went off this afternoon. They frequently test the system but occasionally it’s a bad sensor. In either case, the alarm lets out a very piercing shriek, not unlike the one my mother let out when I was two and she discovered I was really eating a mud pie. I heard the door open across the hall from me so I decided to tell my neighbor it might just be another false alarm and I was going downstairs to check it out because the noise was now driving me crazy. OMG. It was the Adonis I saw checking in yesterday. If he fell under the category of eye candy, then this was Mr. Godiva himself. Tall, dark and handsome had the body of a runningback, which is what you would have seen me doing if the fire was real and I had left his trusting ass upstairs.
Early in the evening I was standing in the lobby when Mr. Godiva walked behind me and patted me on the shoulder saying, “Hi, neighbor!” He touched me, and now my world will never be the same, because he touched me.
Sorry Barbra.